A conversation about grief, loss and how best to remember.

This is an incredible question.  I brought in an expert to answer it.

Question:

Hi Emelia,

I have become close with the mother of my friend who committed suicide last year. We have only  gotten to know each other since her son/my friend passed, and it has been a very enriching relationship, I feel really grateful for the ability to help her through her grieving.

I have become close with the mother of my friend who committed suicide last year. We have only  gotten to know each other since her son/my friend passed, and it has been a very enriching relationship, I feel really grateful for the ability to help her through her grieving.

As for myself, my personal beliefs about life and death leave me with pretty much no sadness/anger/regrets that often come with the “loss” of a loved one. I subscribe to the ideas of reincarnation, death as a continuation of life, and our time here in the physical universe as merely an illusion dreamt up by the Self, our true spiritual nature that is One with God, and our inevitable return to the awareness of that being.

Many people take death very seriously and I think that dumping my beliefs on my friend’s mother seems insensitive and reckless, or is it?

My friends birthday is coming up in February. His mother wants to do a symbolic activity, she suggested bird release, Chinese lanterns, balloon full of little notes and wishes for my friend to send up to “heaven.” Do you have any suggestions for a symbolic gestures that doesn’t involve caged birds, fire hazards or littering? Or is this a fuck-it scenario where the meaning behind the act holds more importance than the environmental treason?

I think the main question is, how do you cope with comforting those who cope differently than you?

My Answer. A conversation on live radio with someone who has had their share of loss. 

Listen in. We talk about loss, grief, and the longing to be normal. Click on the link above.

Without-darkness-you-cannot-see-the-stars.jpg