Why is it so hard to get on the mat?

Why is it so hard to get up off my rump and practice? Why is it the last thing I want to do? Why is it when I feel so edgy and crumbly and nutty and twinchy I would rather sit on this and eat on that and shit on him and snip at her. Why on earth do I …

The happiest day of my honeymoon

The happiest day of my honeymoon was when I ate chips in bed after a nap while he played angry birds on his Iphone beside me.

We saw some amazing things, don’t get me wrong.

A humpbacked whale breeched at sunset just for us.

We hiked 5 hours to the peak of a mountain and held each other while the sun and rain battled it out around us.

We snorkeled.

We went to a fair.

We drank shade grown Kauaiian coffee in the bay where the song “Puff the Magic Dragon” was composed…

Don’t Buy Another Online Program- a manifesto for enlightenment

I was feeling really down yesterday.
“I don’t make enough money.”
“I work too hard.”
“I’m not appreciated for what I do.”
“No one cares.”
“I should just quit.”
I was throwing myself a real fucking pity party, and of course I found myself squished down the rabbit hole of the internet and emerged out onto a website that blew me away…

Don't Buy Another Online Program- a manifesto for enlightenment

I was feeling really down yesterday.
“I don’t make enough money.”
“I work too hard.”
“I’m not appreciated for what I do.”
“No one cares.”
“I should just quit.”
I was throwing myself a real fucking pity party, and of course I found myself squished down the rabbit hole of the internet and emerged out onto a website that blew me away…

How to do a ritual:

I think we need more ritual in our lives. Here is one for you for this New Years. It is a prayer to bring you your greatest longing. Take it on. It works. Happy 2013.

Fuck you “spiritual teacher”, you don’t know shit. A rant.

First off, if you call yourself a “spiritual teacher” you might not be one.

I was on the internet today and I came across a site I don’t care to endorse but let’s just say there was a article from a new-age “spiritual teacher” and from now on we are going to call her really pretty skinny lady. Really pretty skinny lady gave us a few “juicy tips” on how to get more publicity for our work and how to better brand ourselves and then offered up a “once in a lifetime” tele-seminar to give up the “full meal deal sesh” on how to really “amp up sales.”

Do you notice how many “quotations” I am using.

This is because everything she is saying is fucking bullshit.

Recap: This woman is telling me that because she is a “spiritual teacher” I should buy something from her and it will help me make more money and get more famous.

The emperor has no clothes.

I just hung up on my mother

I hung up on my mother this evening. While she was talking to me, I set the phone down and disconnected.

I told her some exciting news about my life and once again she was not excited for me. “How much does the rent cost? Is that a smart idea?

Has my man killed the feminist in me?

*This essay is written from the point of view of a hetero 33-year-old white Canadian woman.

He left this morning for his Vipassana retreat. 10 days- no contact. Within 2 hours of his departure I found myself sitting on the couch in my underpants, eating a hotdog for breakfast…