Big Wins, Face Lifts and Freedom

I won! (and I didn’t even cheat)

Best Radio Personality is: Emelia Symington Fedy

Best Social Media Personality is: Emelia Symington Fedy @ tryingtobegood.com

Thank you to all my loves for voting.

I’m sending you all this cool shit because Trying to be Good is going through a big revamp. I’m not willing to be silenced for being a loud woman anymore. I will not be censored because it makes people in power uncomfortable. And I want security for my children.

Antigone, Medusa, so many mythic women have been burned or made into monsters for not following the leader and I’m breaking the rules now, today, I can’t believe it wasn’t sooner.

I’m taking Trying to be Good into a new direction, where I offer some of my goddess-given gifts in a multitude of new ways.

6 years in and finally I figure out it’s been here all along. So I want you to get excited with me about what’s to come because I’m still here because of you.

Here’s an interview with Vancouver Presents called 20 questions if you want to get to get a bit closer…

20 Questions with Emelia Symington Fedy

Your first job. I scooped ice cream in a small down deli for a summer and I got fired for stealing money from the till. Yes, I stole the money, but my best friend stole so much more than me that she paid for her first year tuition in college so I really felt my firing was an unfair decision. I only cleared a couple hundred bucks?!

The job you always wanted as a child. I wanted to be a lawyer because my babysitter said I was the best arguer and manipulative child she’d ever met.

Your pet peeve. People who write me asking for favours, ideas, inspiration, how I do what I do and I take the time and craft a response full of heart and passion and then they don’t write back to say thank you. Bad form. Also, don’t be more then 10 minutes late. For some reason this throws me into a blind rage.

Your hero. Wow. I have so many. Joan Rivers was a hero to me because she was so badass and edgy before her time. Her parents kicked her out while she was trying to make a living in comedy so she slept on her friends couches. She never quit and never said no to a job. Shopping Channel. Yes! Reality TV. Yes! Hollywood Squares Yes! She kept her ego in check, knew it could end at any moment and never stopped working her ass off until the day she died. I’m also very impressed by Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. They are out loud hilarious feminists who support each other in their careers and talk about how uncomfortable spanks are.

Your biggest indulgence. Chips. Chips. Chips. A nightly organic hand-rolled cigarette. Chips. Chips, and getting my eyebrows threaded.

One thing no one knows about you. Every day at around 5 I become very overwhelmed. My heart races and I don’t think I can make it through the rest of the day. So I tell my kids it’s “cuddle time” and we lie down together so I can just deep breathe and try to find some resilience before I have to get up and finish the rest of my day. I make theatre during the day and do a live radio show at night so…basically 2 jobs and 2 kids is a bit too much to handle sometimes and the anxiety attacks.

Three things you would want with you on a deserted island. Q-tips. I’m addicted. My diva cup (for obvious reasons) and my husband (because he can make anything out of sticks and we’d end up living in the coolest treehouse).

The one word your best friend would use to describe you. Loyal

If you were not pursuing a career as a performer, what would you be doing right now? On a lot of meds. Miserable. Feeling worthless. Art is what makes my life meaningful, it’s the small thing I can do to try, from my little place, to be useful to the world. If I share myself, my fear, my grief, my anger, my questions, my imperfections, my hope is that then folks hopefully relate and maybe feel less alone and effed up themselves. I just want to be honest about how hard life is sometimes, and terrifying. And if I couldn’t express that, when I don’t express that, I turn into a real sad sack.

Hero or villain? I’m a villain against the bad guys.

Your life’s motto/mantra. What you Seek is Seeking You. (Rumi). Although I almost puked a bit writing it, I still hope it’s true.

Your favourite playwright. Great question. Wow. Eugene Ionesco. I love absurdity. Also Karen Hines from Calgary, she’s a neo-boufoon who’s dark, stark, hilarity has been inspiring me for years.

The last book you read. The Girl With the Lower Back Tattoo by Amy Schumer. Don’t bother. It was a total hate read. I found it privileged and boring.

]If you were a cartoon character what cartoon character would you be and why? Oh easy. Miss Piggy. She’s the queen.

What will it say on your grave marker? Loved. Beloved. Died old. Before her husband.

Who would you most like to have dinner with? David Sedaris, I’m working on it. I’ve sent him three letters, the prologue to my book and some of my fingernail clippings. He loved them. He’s written back twice, so we’re almost at pen pal status.

Your idea of happiness. My book is a bestseller. Every once in awhile someone “recognizes me” so I get to feel popular and current. I’ve taken all my friends on a vacation and we all have separate bungalows and the water is turquoise. (Oh, and my kids are healthy) I understand if this answer makes you hate me. Again, I really am trying to be honest here.

The one thing in your life that makes you most proud. That I’m feeling my feelings. It’s so hard to feel all the feelings ya know? It’s so hard to not push them away with drugs and food and TV and the phone and all our bad habits and right now I’m really trying, to feel how I feel, even when it feels unbearable…

If you could go back in time, what would you tell your 20-year old self? Don’t suck so much dick. You don’t like it. You don’t know how to do it, you don’t even like him. Just stop. Crawl into bed, light a candle and read your favourite book instead.

To be or not to be? To Be. To Be. To Be. To Be. What else is there?

that was fun hey?!

So next, a teaser in the new TTBG:  The Anti-Mastermind Group. Where women gather together to facilitate how to make a living doing what we love. Not get rich, not get famous, not fast-paced back-breaking filtered bullshit. Simply making a living at what you love and being your deep dark self the whole time.

And another teaser- The TTBG Podcast is going to launch late Spring. Long form interviews with amazing people about what matters most to them. 

This website is going to get a whole lot bigger and I’ll never “let myself go” for being too crass. Freedom. And you are coming with me.

Here’s a picture of me doing 5-min Therapy in a mall. It’s a performance art piece that tours nationally. I give you the best advice about your most burning question in under 5 minutes. It’s my superpower. I’ll be doing these live on TTBG soon too. So if you want personal, straight-up advice contact me here and we’ll set it up.

Here’s to the unknown. Here’s to what’s always been known. I’m really excited to begin. Again and again and again…