Dear Preparation H.

Dear Preparation H, I’m a woman of the age that now experiences daily morning puffy eyes. I’m also the brand of woman who will spend anything on a miracle cure so when I was told by a makeup artist that a secret pro tip was to put Prep H on your eyes to bring down the puff I sent my …

A Rant for Everyone Who Feels Rage.

Dear Motherfucker. Ya you. Why do I start off so aggressive? Because it seems to be the only thing that gets your attention. I’ve tried talking. For years. I plan it out in my head first, so I don’t offend you. I write it down. I make my points clearly and I remember to see your point of view too. …

Rules For Writing An Email (for people under 75)

You begin with a hello. Cheerio. Greetings. I usually say Hey Pal. To the dopes who jump full speed into their request or point of conversation- think of the greeting like foreplay, soften me up a bit before you try to ram it in. Much thanks. Next you might ask a question. This is fine. I like questions. They make …

The Abundance Train Just Crashed

We all remember The Secret. I got deep into that shit. The idea of manifesting your dreams and creating your own reality is fucking awesome; and in my experience, it sometimes it works; I did rituals by the ocean when I was longing for a mate. I wrote the traits I wanted him to have on a piece of paper and …

This Yoga Festival is Making Me Feel Like Shit

I travelled across North America to assist at a yoga festival. I thought it would inspire. Instead I found myself crying in an outdoor port-a-potty like a teenage girl at a rave…Why is it that sometimes when I do yoga, or teach yoga or are around yogi’s I feel like a super bag of shit? CLICK HERE for the whole nightmarish …

Don't Buy Another Online Program- a manifesto for enlightenment

I was feeling really down yesterday.
“I don’t make enough money.”
“I work too hard.”
“I’m not appreciated for what I do.”
“No one cares.”
“I should just quit.”
I was throwing myself a real fucking pity party, and of course I found myself squished down the rabbit hole of the internet and emerged out onto a website that blew me away…

Don’t Buy Another Online Program- a manifesto for enlightenment

I was feeling really down yesterday.
“I don’t make enough money.”
“I work too hard.”
“I’m not appreciated for what I do.”
“No one cares.”
“I should just quit.”
I was throwing myself a real fucking pity party, and of course I found myself squished down the rabbit hole of the internet and emerged out onto a website that blew me away…

Fuck you “spiritual teacher”, you don’t know shit. A rant.

First off, if you call yourself a “spiritual teacher” you might not be one.

I was on the internet today and I came across a site I don’t care to endorse but let’s just say there was a article from a new-age “spiritual teacher” and from now on we are going to call her really pretty skinny lady. Really pretty skinny lady gave us a few “juicy tips” on how to get more publicity for our work and how to better brand ourselves and then offered up a “once in a lifetime” tele-seminar to give up the “full meal deal sesh” on how to really “amp up sales.”

Do you notice how many “quotations” I am using.

This is because everything she is saying is fucking bullshit.

Recap: This woman is telling me that because she is a “spiritual teacher” I should buy something from her and it will help me make more money and get more famous.

The emperor has no clothes.

Yogi’s are the most disconnected and self-serving people I know.

…and I can say this because I am one. Not just a yogi, but also a yoga teacher with two certificates under my belt. You can call me the average Jane of Yoga, you can call me very generally entrenched in the community. I teach workshops, I fly to far away places to study with the teachers that inspire me. …