Privacy is Necessary

Sometimes other people say it better for you… I used to think it was brave to let it all out, to share myself candidly and unabashed with the world. I still do. But now there is a deeper part of me that also knows how rich privacy is, how secrets and mystery grow into creations that far surpass what I thought …

None of this makes us crazy

Some mornings I wake up feeling really grounded and by the afternoon I’m overwhelmed and wanna run for the hills in my flip flops and hide under the leaves. This doesn’t make me crazy. One night I’ll have a nightmare and wake up crying and this affects my productivity for the rest of the day. This doesn’t make me crazy. I sometimes use …

If I Had To Pick One Thing…It Would Be Women.

I had an hour to myself this morning so I decided to take the time to try and do something nice for myself. I’ve been feeling disconnected lately. Out of touch with “myself”. Remember yourself? That person that you used to journal about and whose hair you used to brush. I recalled that at my yoga teacher training (one of …

Female Friends Fighting is Feminist

  When women fight with me I know that means we’re tight. I don’t mean get nasty or are always on my ass. I don’t mean say mean shit or complaining all the time. I don’t mean have higher than hell expectations they demand me to reach. I don’t mean being generally rude and snotty. I don’t mean flying off …

Bigger and Bolder and Golder

During a session with an intuitive a year ago she told me that she saw me as I saw myself…a hunched over old cackling clown, dragging a bunch of junk behind her, with a limp and smeared red lipstick; rebellious and shit-disturbing. I was funny and entertaining and even subversive sure, but it was an act – to soften my …

Learning How To Be A Bad Mom (is of course good)

My oldest son just turned 4 and you know how every parent is like “cherish every minute, it goes by so fast.” Uh. No. It. Doesn’t. These years have reminded me of when I used to work at a shitty deli and I’d look up at the clock, sure that my shift was almost over and only 10 min had …

Toddlers Are The Worst Hell In The World.

It is not a wish I would suggest on the greatest demon himself. It starts in the morning with “I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT AND PARTY EVERY DAY I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT AND PARTY EVERY DAY. I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT AND PARTY EVERY DAY I WANNA ROCK AND ROLL ALL NIGHT AND …

Super Nerd

I grew up in a trailer in the woods. It was not a luxurious double-wide but we did have an addition built on to it so there was an extra room. We grew meat birds and to keep the baby chicks warm in the spring we would keep them in the house under a heat lamp. I preferred them living in my bedroom so I would fall asleep every night to chirping of birds and the smell of tiny poos.

How to Deal with Cruelty

I’ve been encountering a lot of cruel people lately. Not physically cruel, that’s a whole other conversation with a whole other set of rules, but emotionally cruel people, out to hurt for hurtings sake. And my impulse is to retaliate. To protect myself and my family and my community from this cruel behavior. And it’s my right to do so, …

Letters to Celebrities I've Never Sent- Amy Poehler

Dear Amy, I’m writing to you even though every inch of me is screaming noooooooooo. I’m so deeply ashamed that I’ve even started this letter…and as I continue this sentence the loathing grows. Everything I type is vile, clever garbage and I want to shoot myself (oh God more garbage) to stop my brain from continuing… But. I’m going to do …